Joke thread!!!
#271
Dirty Redhead
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What's the difference between the Pope and Michael Jackson?
The Pope is dead.
**************
A pirate walks into a bar with a ship's wheel stuck to his crotch.
The bartender says, "Hey, you got a wheel stuck to your crotch."
The pirate replies, "Yarr, me ship wrecked in a terrible storm and my ********* swelled with an infection while I was knocked unconscious against the wheel. Can you please call a doctor?"
**************
(This one is for Ali G)
How many dead babies can you fit in a blender?
The police report indicates three.
The Pope is dead.
**************
A pirate walks into a bar with a ship's wheel stuck to his crotch.
The bartender says, "Hey, you got a wheel stuck to your crotch."
The pirate replies, "Yarr, me ship wrecked in a terrible storm and my ********* swelled with an infection while I was knocked unconscious against the wheel. Can you please call a doctor?"
**************
(This one is for Ali G)
How many dead babies can you fit in a blender?
The police report indicates three.
#272
Dirty Redhead
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Location: Commuting? I don't know what that means anymore.
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A white man is driving his Cadillac on a highway in Texas. He notices a black man pushing his bicycle along the side of the road.
He pulls over to talk to the black man and offer him a ride. He says "I can't fit your bike in my car, but I can tie it to the back and let you ride behind me. If I'm going too fast, just yell."
The black man says "No thanks, that sounds pretty risky" and keeps pushing his bike down the road.
He pulls over to talk to the black man and offer him a ride. He says "I can't fit your bike in my car, but I can tie it to the back and let you ride behind me. If I'm going too fast, just yell."
The black man says "No thanks, that sounds pretty risky" and keeps pushing his bike down the road.
#281
Token Toyota Mod
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Originally Posted by sonicsuby
You, sir, are gay.
The go soggy go thread is where we all run and hide when Kevin is around.
PLEASE DON'T BAN ME BANSUVS!!!!!!
#282
A man and his wife were working in their garden one day and the man looks over at his wife and says: "Your butt is getting really big, I mean really big. I bet your butt is bigger than the barbecue." With that he proceeded to get a measuring tape and measure the grill and then went over to where his wife was working and measured his wife's bottom. Yes, I was right, your butt is two inches wider than the barbecue!!!" The woman chose to ignore her husband.
Later that night in bed, the husband is feeling a little frisky. He makes some advances towards his wife who completely brushes him off. "What's wrong?" he asks. She answers: "Do you really think I'm going to fire up this big-*** grill for one little weenie?"
Later that night in bed, the husband is feeling a little frisky. He makes some advances towards his wife who completely brushes him off. "What's wrong?" he asks. She answers: "Do you really think I'm going to fire up this big-*** grill for one little weenie?"
#283
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Originally Posted by LagnWagn
A man and his wife were working in their garden one day and the man looks over at his wife and says: "Your butt is getting really big, I mean really big. I bet your butt is bigger than the barbecue." With that he proceeded to get a measuring tape and measure the grill and then went over to where his wife was working and measured his wife's bottom. Yes, I was right, your butt is two inches wider than the barbecue!!!" The woman chose to ignore her husband.
Later that night in bed, the husband is feeling a little frisky. He makes some advances towards his wife who completely brushes him off. "What's wrong?" he asks. She answers: "Do you really think I'm going to fire up this big-*** grill for one little weenie?"
Later that night in bed, the husband is feeling a little frisky. He makes some advances towards his wife who completely brushes him off. "What's wrong?" he asks. She answers: "Do you really think I'm going to fire up this big-*** grill for one little weenie?"
haha
#284
A vampire walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a glass of hot water, confused, the bartender asks "hey dont you guys drink blood or somthing?" and the vampire says "yeah, but im having tea today".....then the bartender replies "then why did you ask for water?"...the vampire pulls a used tampon out of his pocket and says "havnt you ever heard of tea bags?"
Last edited by Impooter; 05-04-2005 at 06:00 PM.
#285
Registered User
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Location: Front pleated TWill pants...
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Originally Posted by LagnWagn
A man and his wife were working in their garden one day and the man looks over at his wife and says: "Your butt is getting really big, I mean really big. I bet your butt is bigger than the barbecue." With that he proceeded to get a measuring tape and measure the grill and then went over to where his wife was working and measured his wife's bottom. Yes, I was right, your butt is two inches wider than the barbecue!!!" The woman chose to ignore her husband.
Later that night in bed, the husband is feeling a little frisky. He makes some advances towards his wife who completely brushes him off. "What's wrong?" he asks. She answers: "Do you really think I'm going to fire up this big-*** grill for one little weenie?"
Later that night in bed, the husband is feeling a little frisky. He makes some advances towards his wife who completely brushes him off. "What's wrong?" he asks. She answers: "Do you really think I'm going to fire up this big-*** grill for one little weenie?"