shaggadelic

iTrader: (26)

ok well some of u knw i have a son and i'm not with the mom i'm thinking about getting full or half custody with medical rights.. i have his mom on tape saying that she thinks taking him to the doctors is dumb, always telling me i can't pick him up, swaering in front of him,my son always comes to my house with cuts or brusies and wen i picked him up on thursday he had a cigerette burn on the his left leg took him to the doctors for that today, she thinks its my job to take him to the doctors and to get hime meds., she says her new bf is his dad to me, everytime theres a concert she asks me to watch him so she can always go out and party and if i can't she'll say shes gonna take him away, wen she says i can pick him up i show up and shes not there, and wen i have him for a week she'll call me like after 2 days and wants me to bring him back, she claims disability cuz of her asma so she don't have to work and get more money out of me and the state, i have all of our conversations on tape too, oh and wen she gose on trips she lies and says her plain is delayed so i have to take more time off of work but shes acually here cuz i called all the airlines to find out if she was lying..so do u guys have any advice and do u think i can get my son from her?

Sushi_n_Beer

I think you should carefully document any of these occurances. Take pictures as needed. What did the doctor say about the cigarette burn?
btw, how old is your son? Cuts and bruises could be normal kids play. But if it's everytime... I would be suspicious -- especially if your son is very young. Cigarette burns sets off an internal alarm to me!!

That you have audio evidence of some of what you mentioned could be very helpful for your case. Again, I can't stress enough how important it is to document things. If it lands in court, you'll be better prepaired and will also look more organized. If you are seeking legal advice, any documentation and evidence you have will be a boon. If she has neighbors, perhaps you can find out if there is a 3rd party witness to these or related events.

From your side of the story, it sounds like the mom isn't a very fit parent. It makes me sick that people swear in front of their kids -- and physical abuse is on a whole level of its own.

namakemono

iTrader: (3)

document everything you can. get some legal advice from pros, get ready to dish out the skrilla.

my ex-aunt kidnapped her kids and the family van from my uncle, guess who won custody. not my uncle. i hope that beeeeach burns in hell and dies slow, gets brought back, then dies slow again.

shaggadelic

iTrader: (26)

the doc send it was a burn and it got infected so i got medi. for it and yeah i got picks and the audio is of our conversations on the phone too so u hear her and me both takling and btw my son is 18months old some cuts seem like there maybe from play some our on his checks (face) she said he got those from hitting his head on the table cuz he was mad. but others like his nose she let him run around with a blanket over his head so he busted it up bad like needed stiches but neva took him too the docs. and others like a scratch on his face she said was from the sis her nail scratched him but that was right next to he bruse on his face so i think he was hit. he is stll very young 1yr 6months oldi hope i get him

WindCloud

I am not a legal expert or anything, but if you have documentation, 'evidence' to show your point then by all means. I don't see why in 'this judiciary' system, you can't win w/o evidence. Though, the evidence must have proof of this. And it seems to me that yes, you do have it on hand.

Personally, my views is that first off you are doing all you can and I think you deserve a lot, well, in the sense that you want 'full custody' of the kid. I know I am no one to lecture or say, but I would hurry and get the kid, be responsible for that kid's life and save him. Abuse on a kid that young could lead to major problems down the road. I would cut all ties if after you have the kid, meaning don't pay for her bills cuz she's faking it and all that. But not only that, but for what she is seemingly doing.

I hope you realize too that, the kid is innocent. A young baby suffering from abuse and yet is so fragile. Sorry, but I just feeling for the kid I guess. I seen it all around as well, how kids get treated so bad. They leave them shirtless running around in A/C stores, and what have you.

I don't know all the details, but just wishing you the best.

Take cares..

Maximal

iTrader: (1)

The standard the Family court looks at in this type of determination is the best interest of the child. That being said, the courts favor having both parents involved unless there is a clear risk to the safety of the child.

Aside from the cigarette burn which may or may not be from your ex, or her boyfriend, there is little there that a court is going to look at to give you full custody.

Has paternity been extablished? Is there a current custody order by the court? If so, it can be either a simple or very difficult process to change it. A court may change a custody order but again, they favor involvement by both parents. They may alter the order to give your ex limited rights to custody, but it really depends on the situation.

Your best bet is to consult with a Family Law attorney.

good lcuk.

Tiare

iTrader: (18)

Hey man,

Seek some legal advice from pros, then you can be more comfortable in your case.

poser

i'd call CPS and see what they have to say about it...maybe they can keep your kid from staying with the mom...

silver satin

iTrader: (7)

My friend went through about the same thing you are he wrote down everything and made notes about anything that didn't seem normal to him and when he was ready he took her to court and now his daughter lives with him in NJ and his ex lives in WA not only did he take there daughter she lost her son from a previous marriage to his father. And because he told them she used drug which she did now she has to go to his lawyer for UA's and has to pass before she can see there daughter. So this summer she failed to have a UA done so thats a year she won't see her daughter. And the bruises I don't think my son is four and Autistic and runs aroung like a manic all day and he hardly has bruises..But what ever you do don't do anything that will make you look bad I mean don't even get a ticket you don't want any excuse for them to not give you custody. With my friend there was much more and this was over the span of about a year and half...Yes the thing he said he did too was acted normal toward her he said when he would talk to her and she would make him mad he would tell her he had to get off the phone and then he would scream or something like that just don't lose your cool around her easier said than done...

shaggadelic

iTrader: (26)

yes i am the father i took the test thanks for all ur help i hope i can win i heard hawaii court systems are harsh to fathers tho

silver satin

iTrader: (7)

Who asked if you were the father???

shaggadelic

iTrader: (26)

he did and i knw i should cuz she told me a few times that hes not mine so i had to find out 4 myself

Maximal

iTrader: (1)

Paternity can be established 2 ways. 1. if you're present in the delivery room and sign a certificate that designates you as a parent. 2. If that hasn't happened, then CSEA (child support enforcement agency) can mandate a dna test.

I'm assuming you signed the paper at the hospital or had a dna test done.

The reason I ask, is that it's the first step necessary in any type of custody action. The moter is presumed a parent (obviously) but the father needs to have legally established paternity to have any say in a custody action.

Unless there's been a custody decree by the court or you agreed in writing to your current custody situation, both legal and physical custody are presumed shared by both parents. To change this can be a lengthy process.

Again, contact a family law attorney, and ask for a consultation. Most of the time an initial consultation won't cost anything.

good luck

shaggadelic

iTrader: (26)

yeh i did both i was there wen she gave birth and i also took a dna test but there has not been anything done yet about custody no court orders or nothing we just split and she has him for now and also that burn she's saying its a misqito bite and her family is saying if he has that burn there "break my f**ken neck i have that all on tape from today and shes tring to say i gave him the burn and also the cut that i said was a scar on his nose, she's saying she took him to the E.R. and that said to her just leave it alone.. but i told her so do u have records and weres the medis. for the cut cause it was very deep and she said that they never gave her any and she never answered that part if she has proof she took him to the ER

PS my moms friend whos a judge is helping me look for someone and he's also a family court judge... thanks for the help... sorry for telling u guuys but its just somthing i had to get out of me

bpang1

iTrader: (25)

Get That Kid Away From That Witch!