RIP Mitch Hedberg
03-31-2005, 04:19 PM
#1
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RIP Mitch Hedberg
We lost one of the best comedians ever.
I'll start if off....
"The thing about tennis is: no matter how much I play, I'll never be as good as a wall. I played a wall once. They're ****ing relentless."
I'll start if off....
"The thing about tennis is: no matter how much I play, I'll never be as good as a wall. I played a wall once. They're ****ing relentless."
03-31-2005, 04:54 PM
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"I used to do drugs. I still do, but I used to, too."
"A severed foot is the ultimate stocking stuffer."
"One time a guy handed me a picture of himself, and he said, "Here's a picture of me when I was younger." Every picture of you is of when you were younger. Here's a picture of me when I am older. You son of a b*tch, how'd you pull that off? Let me see that camera..."
"I played golf...I did not get a hole in one, but I did hit a guy. That's way more satisfying..."
"I wrote a script for a guy, and he said he liked it but he thought that I need to rewrite it. I said, "F*ck that, I'll just make a copy."
"A severed foot is the ultimate stocking stuffer."
"One time a guy handed me a picture of himself, and he said, "Here's a picture of me when I was younger." Every picture of you is of when you were younger. Here's a picture of me when I am older. You son of a b*tch, how'd you pull that off? Let me see that camera..."
"I played golf...I did not get a hole in one, but I did hit a guy. That's way more satisfying..."
"I wrote a script for a guy, and he said he liked it but he thought that I need to rewrite it. I said, "F*ck that, I'll just make a copy."
03-31-2005, 05:35 PM
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Originally Posted by Salty
Who?
Last edited by MeaCulpa; 04-01-2005 at 10:11 AM.
03-31-2005, 05:52 PM
#5
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"I bought a donut and the cashier gave me a reciept. There's no need to bring ink and paper into this."
His jokes sound a bit bland if someone else were to say it. He just has this sarcastic lazy voice that makes everything he says funny.
His jokes sound a bit bland if someone else were to say it. He just has this sarcastic lazy voice that makes everything he says funny.
03-31-2005, 06:36 PM
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http://www.bobrivers.com/audiovault/.../Track%209.wav
right click save as
this was his best bit... especially since he shows his love for fedex
edgar,
right click save as
this was his best bit... especially since he shows his love for fedex
edgar,
Last edited by zumnwrx; 03-31-2005 at 09:23 PM.
04-01-2005, 07:11 AM
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Originally Posted by zumnwrx
RIP
sounds like he died in his Jersey hotel room of a heart attack altho nothing is confired yet
edgar,
sounds like he died in his Jersey hotel room of a heart attack altho nothing is confired yet
edgar,
Originally Posted by Dead Comedian
"I used to do drugs. I still do, but I used to, too."
04-01-2005, 10:08 AM
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yeah i heard the news on live105 yesterday when they play random comics.
that my guess too. too bad. he was... IS... a funny guy. sometimes dark but very practical and smart nonetheless.
"a smoke detector is more like a 9-volt battery drainer. you got a 9-volt battery you need to drain? buy this circle!"
Originally Posted by Heavy Dan
that's my guess... coca-ethanol poisoning.
"a smoke detector is more like a 9-volt battery drainer. you got a 9-volt battery you need to drain? buy this circle!"
04-02-2005, 01:10 PM
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Originally Posted by Oaf
Hmmmm...coke-induced heart failure?
Actually I believe he had a heart condition from birth. Dunno for sure.
"I opened this container of yogurt and underneath the lid it said please try again, because there was a contest I did not know about. But I thought I had opened the yogurt wrong. Or maybe the yogurt company was trying to inspire me. Don't give up, friend, try again. A message of inspiration from your friends at Yoplait. Fruit on the bottom, hope on top."
